Ahoy Mates!

here to tell ye swabs and landlubbers that me ship has made port and to Beware... cause this pirate's ready and willin'
to make mayhem and merriment at
yer next Festive Affair!

Why a pirate?  WHY NOT, SAYS I !

Pirates be known fer thar fierce partyin'
and this pirate's got stories to tell,
games to be played, fun to be had by all and a bit of jugglin' to boot.
So what are ye waiting fer?

Hire this old sea dog today!
(Reasonable Rates, mates!)